The kind of grandpa I want to be

Countdown to Kianna: 25, 24, 23 days away, or sooner, before Granddaughter Kianna arrives. This was mom-to-be Kishia’s text today after her doc appointment: “1 centimeter dilated. 50% effaced. Baby is head down and ready to rock.”

Kelly (that’s Mrs. Grandpa) told Kishia she can’t wait to see Kianna. Kishia responded by saying she can’t wait for Kianna to be out.

Maybe soon?

Grandpa’s message to Kianna, #14 …

Kianna, I’m listening. And I’m hearing you. That’s what I want to you know when you talk to me, when you show me the latest picture you’ve drawn, when you want to tell me a story about your toys, when you are sad or cranky, when I get on your nerves. I’m listening. That’s the kind of grandpa I’ll be. As a Daddy I was too much of a shouter, a yeller — probably even a screamer at times. I used to have a bad temper. I didn’t hit people, but I could hurt them with my voice. I wish I had listened more, because I was probably shouting sometimes when my girls really needed to tell me something important.

I don’t shout anymore; haven’t for a long time. Shouldn’t have been shouting to begin with. That sorta haunts me sometimes.

I’m listening, Kianna. When you just call out of the blue to chat, when you have great news and you can’t wait to tell me, I’ll listen, and I’ll hear you. And if you’ve got something to tell — or to confess — that you just can’t bring yourself to tell anyone, either because you think it’s too awful or because it will disappoint the people who love you … I will listen and hear you. I’ll cry with you and laugh with you.

And I will love you. Always.

That’s the kind of grandpa I want to be.

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Filed under Kianna Allene Brown, MIP: Memoir-in-progress

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