We’re counting down the days until Natasha and Kory tie the knot. No one asked for my advice, but I haven’t let that stop me. I’m listing some of the best ways to wreck your marriage.
Wrecking ball No. 5: Life isn’t fair, but marriage should be. We deserve equal time. Wife has a girl’s night out, husband should get a guy’s night out. (Be sure to keep a list of times this equity is not achieved. We’ll revisit the idea in about a week with a wrecking ball named “Keep a list.”)
True story, told from a third party. Husband spends hours after work or on weekends cutting wood to earn extra money. It wasn’t uncommon for him to come home, hands calloused and stained with chainsaw oil and nostrils caked with chainsaw dust, to hear his wife announce: “You got be out in the woods with your chainsaw, so I get to go shopping with my friends.” Then she insisted that he do the dishes and clean up the kitchen.
True story, I swear.
Did the wrecking ball work?
Knocked ‘em off the cliff, so to speak. Divorce. It was a marriage full of wrecking balls, wielded carelessly by both parties.
Tie the fairness equation to money and you’ve got a ginormous wrecking ball. “You bought new tires for your truck, so I’m gonna buy myself some new shoes, a couple of purses, maybe have my hair done.” “I can choose to buy what I want because I make the money.” (Try that one for an instant wedge in your relationship. Then pound the wedge with more talk about fairness and equality, kind of the way two little kids might argue.
You’ve heard the saying that it takes a big man to cry, and an even bigger man to laugh at that man.
Well, it takes an even bigger man to unashamedly admit that he still loves the message and harmony of Southern Gospel and the Gaither Vocal Band. Tonight’s playlist is a double-dose of grace from the old and new: Sinner Saved By Grace a la the GVB and Jesus, Friend of Sinners by Casting Crowns, featuring the piercing indictment, “Open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing finger.”